Friday, January 30, 2015

How I came to Blog

Friends:

Many of you have read my posts as emails, quite a number of you were added at different times.  Over many months the list grew to over 100.  You know I lost my first wife suddenly in September of 2010 and I found grief very, very hard to confront and that it eventually led to a spiritual re-awakening in me that is still beyond my comprehension in many ways. 

I was in grief counseling at the time with Hospice of Chattanooga and seeing a psychologist.  I remember after the re-awakening telling my Hospice counselor how I had this overwhelming feeling and knowing pouring over me "To Share".  For weeks we discussed this but "To Share" what?  Yet within months of that I started writing.  Then it became clear what I was to share.  That's how the email list started.

As I post these on the blog you will often see the original date I sent them out as emails. (As well as new ones, and things I've written as MId-Week Messages for Unity of Chattanooga that are emailed to our congregation.)  My psychologist was on that original email list from very early on.  One day in a session he told me he thought I did not comprehend how very good my writings were and asked me if he could use them anonymously with other patients.  He went on to say: "because they can help people." In later sessions he told me that they were helpful when he used them and would continue to do so.  I have had a  number of people tell me; "What are you doing with these?  You are keeping them right?"

I often meditate and do Qigong in the morning.  Yesterday I received another clear message "to blog", this wasn't the first, there have been many.  I went about my day and in trying to research the anniversary of when I had first heard of my new wife.  I was rummaging through old emails and not getting anywhere.  Then I thought of trying to pin the time down by digging into my Reflections file of all the emails I had sent out. The first one I opened was The Stir from 10.24.11 and begins "To Blog was the question?"  To me that was spirit yet again confirming the clear messages I had been receiving, one that I had been very hesitant to do.  When I first brought it up I had been warned about negative responses and you better be ready for them to bash you.
    
So as I asked a dear spiritual friend who has her own blog about blogging yesterday. She replied “Build it and they will come.  Don’t worry about how many you reach, but how those you reached are helped.”  I again thought of my psychologists comments and this blog is my attempt to help and to take it to a wider audience. I know I am being guided to do this.

So spread the word to your family, and friends if you think they may enjoy reading my blog.  Also send me energy to finish my book that I have put in so many hours on.  My ego side has been very persistent in shoving "why me, and what have you got to say that's worthwhile" at me.  Just like the blog spirit doesn't care about what my ego says it just keeps telling me to: "finish the book". Just like the blog I need a little push to keep working on it.

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