To Where You Are
09.16.2019
My daughter called last week,
late in the day, it was,
unusual for a call after the kid's bedtime.
She told me
through some tears
about someone calling her asking for her mom.
I told her it
was ok. Consoling her with
telemarketers
don’t know if someone on their list
is deceased even if it’s been nine years.
It was just days before her Angelversary
and touched my daughter’s memories of
her mom.
She ends the call with
“I just wanted to hear your voice.”
This
comment snags a heartstring in me.
This morning she asks me to
be picked up.
She wants to spend the day with a dear friend,
can I take her
there?
Her recent car accident has left her
without a vehicle for a bit.
The
kids are at school
and she doesn’t want to be alone all day today,
today is the
actual Angelversary.
As I set off to pick her up
I’m thinking of her mom, Jane E.
This song I listened to in the early days of
my grief
arises in my awareness:
To Where You Are by Josh Groban.
Today even though I long to
hear your voice again, Jane E.
I know you are still with us.
You see my
daughter called me a couple days after that phone call.
“I’ve got to tell you
this, you’ll understand,” she said.
“I’m sitting on the back deck this morning. Birds are singing all around
and then a cardinal lands on the deck.
I never see
cardinals at my house!
It walks up to near my feet and starts chirping away.”
My response was “that’s your mom saying Hi!”
she says “I know.”
I listen to that song today and
tears flow yet again.
We miss your physical presence Jane E.
but as the song
says:
“And love will live on. And never leave.
Fly me up to where you are.”
Isn’t that what I just related?
A phone call, a thought “I just wanted to hear
your voice”
and a cardinal chirping away.
They all fly us up to where you are
and remind us Love never dies
it just changes form.
All My Love Always, Keith
